Listen to any older person like a mother-in-law or aunt who constantly comments and complains about the weather. It is always too hot or too cold and they are never comfortable with nature. The only effect of their complaints will be to cause a stormy mood for the listener while the wind continues to blow.
Motivational speakers encourage positive thinking and stress that we should focus on the controllable aspect of our lives that we can improve such as financial status, moods and interactive skills instead of sweating the small stuff.
Being women, we try to control most things on a daily basis, but we need to accept that certain aspects of our lives are slightly more difficult to control than a screaming child or a moody man. Good news to know that certain things are manageable while the five uncontrollable things (listed below) are impossible to change. The new expression on the radio is the best advice: build a bridge and get over it.
1. WEATHER
If it is meant to rain on your wedding day, the drops will fall from the sky and the best wedding planner cannot limit the damage if you insisted on a garden ceremony. Weather forecasts are as close as we get to control the climate and even the television reports are inaccurate. Murphy plays a sly role in the weather as it usually rains on Easter weekend (most public holidays and weekends when we make plans to be outdoors) or after a carwash. Weather: we like it or not, the elements will not be instructed or tamed for our benefit.
2. AGEING
Time stands still for nobody and while it is said that true beauty stands the test of time, we will do our best to avoid wrinkles, sagging and gravity as much as possible. New products and procedures try to stop nature’s clock, but only stall the lines for a few years. Most people dread the effects of losing hair, memory and bone density, but ageing is inevitable. We gain experience and wisdom with every facial crease and worrying about getting older just adds to the wrinkles. My granny vainly refuses to wear spectacles as she complains that it makes her look ninety, but does not realise that squinting will make her eye area look a hundred years old. She should be proud of nearly having a century’s life experience, but instead tries to dye her hair and hide her wrinkles that she can hardly see in the mirror because she is not wearing her spectacles.
3. THE JONES’
The neighbour who has the financial advantage to buy two fancy cars, a collegue who has the idyllic family life and a friend who has the perfect family will always be part of our life. These successful counterparts are there to remind us to strive for a more balanced life, but they do not deserve to be the target of envy or maliciousness because we feel they do not deserve the promotion that life has awarded them. We cannot judge or change the fact that somebody will always be more prosperous. Remember that for every person who is richer than you, there is another who suffers. Use the Jones family as mentors and seek advice to build a better relationship.
4. REACTIONS
Working with people is a valuable experience and trying to predict the way another person will react to a situation is almost impossible. Regulating our own behaviour is difficult enough without foreseeing how many people will attend your party or buy a product. Moods, comments and reactions make every person unique and this can be best illustrated when the family that we think we know will surprise us.
5. PARTNERS (ie. men)
They cannot be changed. Training is possible, taming is achievable and acceptance is our only reaction to certain traits in a partner.
Having read this article, stop frowning (lose the wrinkle between your eyes when looking into the sky), smile (increase the laugh lines that indicate a happy life), laugh at our faults and accept that some things cannot be changed as easily as our underwear. Changing our mind about certain things is easier than worrying.
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